Who Gives a S***?
Hello and welcome to The New Podcast News Newsletter (TNPNN), from PodFUC - The Podcast Federation of Unionised Content [sponsored by Spanner Shunt, when it comes to spanners, look no further than the shunters. For 120% off your next spanner, go to shuntorshaft.org and type in the offer code: spannermesideways]. Here are your headlines:
1)
The comedy-food podcast, Off Menu, has announced a new investment and spin-off show where haulage drivers interview lesser-known comedians about their favourite microwave meals. The new show, ‘Fuck Off Menu’, will begin in September and will be hosted by “Big” Geoff Cummings from New Jersey, who has been working for Brady Trucking for the past 34 years.
2)
In a dramatic pivot - and more swearing-based news - the Australian toilet-paper brand, Who Gives a Crap?, has announced that it will create a brand new RSS-YouTube tool which allows users to discover how many awards their favourite shows have received in their lifetime. The new product, ‘Who Gives a Shit?’ will be released early next year.
3)
It’s been reported that the hit podcast, Parenting Hell, is now 87% AI. An insider has told TNPNN that, “Josh and Rob actually don’t mind being parents now, so all this AI bollocks is actually quite convenient to keep the money rolling in without the ball ache of having to sit down and record. I mean, it’s basically the same schtick every week anyway.” Reports that an old episode featuring comedian Russell Howard was 100% AI have been largely exaggerated, despite concerns.
4)
And finally, investigators from FIFA - the global soccer governing body - have got to the bottom of why Argentine players were so violent during several World Cup games. “At half time, the players got into a habit of listening to The Louis Theroux Podcast on Spotify”, an insider at FIFA reveals. “His subtle interview style was so annoying and excessively English that by the start of the second half against Spain, the dressing room was ready to explode.” So why keep listening? “Messi is a big fan and he wanted the other players to connect to their emotions in the hope that it would improve performances on the pitch.” This may explain why several haymakers were thrown by the Argentina players after the final whistle. We are yet to confirm reports that Messi has a large Louis Theroux tattoo covering his inner thigh.
That was The New Podcast News Newsletter from PodFUC. Thank you for existing.
*This is obviously a satirical parody. Please share if you think someone would be amused.
